Sunday, June 21, 2009

Emotional Gumbo

Like an adolescent girl, I’m letting flowers determine the love you have for me…
I’m scared to see the outcome so I never pick off the last few pedals from the roses in my garden…
See…
You have me so confused…
It’s not just roses I use
It’s horoscopes too…
And according to the stars we are compatible…
So…
Why do I feel this way?
I thought you were the answer…
But…
Still I have to question…
Do you love me?
Do you love me not?
And you’re no help cuz you’re constantly sending me these mixed signals…
Do I leave?
Do I stay?
Do I go?
I think about my life and what matters to me the most…
Those words that Donell had said was real…
But don’t explain just how I feel…
About you…
See I feel it’s you singing that song to me…
I tried not to cry but still I weep…
Cuz damn…
I’m really feeling you…
But you’re confused…
Shit I am too…
Exactly what is it you need me to do…
To prove…
I wanna be with you…
O…
It’s not me…
It’s you…
You’re the one emotionally perplexed…
Yet you still manage to have sex…
You know how you feel about that…
Yet…
When it comes to me and us growing…
You give me this “I don’t know” thing…
It’s like I’m the item you need…
But you’re still buying other groceries…
I mean don’t you even notice me…
I dyed my hair yesterday cuz you said you like girls with blonde hair…
Well…
Did you notice the blonde hair?
Of course you didn’t…
That’s what I’m talkin about these mixed signals…
You went on and on the other day about how you thought I’d look pretty…
I did it…
You still say nothing…
I don’t get it…
I just wanna be everything you want me to be…
And I hate feeling desperate…
My pride won’t let me…
My Cali friend said I’m hella sexy…
I shouldn’t even be wasting my time on you…
But it is you I choose…
Sometimes I don’t know who has a cycle
Cuz you change moods more than I do…
Period…
I’m so serious…
If you not feelin this tell me…
I would hate to be just convenient
You’re personal quickie mart…
You’re one stop shop for food, sex, and rest…
Baby I’m the best…
I mean that with all respect…
Just let me know where your decision rest
Cuz if it’s not with me I can move on to the next…

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